BOB: Sam, this is Carole, our new employee who's here to help us
weave these sweaters and get them out the door.
SAM: Nice to meet you, Carole. Thank you for coming in on
Christmas Eve.
CAROLE: No problem.
SAM: Humbug!
(At the sound of the word "humbug," a frenetic assistant to Sam,
Humbug, runs in from off stage. Humbug carries a tablet computer
and has a pencil over her ear like an accountant.)
HUMBUG: You called?
SAM: Carole, this is my assistant, Humbug.
CAROLE: Hello, Humbug! Merry Christmas.
SAM: Humbug, would you fill us in on the latest sales data? I have to
make sure we're tracking with our projections. Carole, for
generations, no one in my family has ever missed their
Christmas projections. Every year our sales go up, up, up!
(Humbug frantically taps and swipes the tablet to come up with the
instant answer to Sam's question.)
HUMBUG: (reading) It appears that we're tracking, Boss. The final order
we have to get out tonight will put us over the top … once
again exceeding expectations!
(music begins to "The Ugly Sweater Business")
BOB: Wonderful news, Sam. Why don't I get Carole started and
we'll get this final order out the door.
CAROLE: Perfect!
HUMBUG: Carole, welcome to the team and welcome to the ugly sweater
business!
12
